how bored can i get?

im bored!!..bored bored bored bored bored!!..theres nothing to do!!..if someone had told mi a few weeks back tt i'll be bored..i'll haved laughed rite in his face..but now..im bored!!..i dun haf anything to look forward to!!..i haf no school..i haf no job..i juz stay at home and slack!!..well..apart from all the shepherdings and caregroups of course..but problem is..if i dun get a job..i cant go out often!!..cos 1) i haf no money and 2) my mom is killing mi for not getting a job and going out so often!!..but wat am i supposed to do my dear mother?..i cant get a flexible job..and if u know how many jobs i haf turned down..i tink u'll be breathing fire down my neck..oh my dear sweet cute god..can u pls tell mi wat to do?!..pretty pretty pls!..can u provide a job for mi?

ok since im so totally free..i haf decided to check up on the word boredom..hmmm..according to the collins dictionary..the defination of bored is: to tire or make weary by being dull, repetitious, or uninteresting..tts exactly wat im feeling now!!..hmmm..how do one measure boredom?..by pounds?..by kilos?..by ounces?..by metres?..well lemme tink..bored is.........juz plain fricking bored!!..who cares how it is measured!!..ok..another question..can one actually die from boredom?..hmmm..can a person juz lie in bed the whole day being bored and come night..becomes stone because of not moving?..can one juz breathe one's final breath because one isnt doing anything?..can boredom actually kill?..i dunno!!..i shall ask god nxt time in heaven..last question..can one be so bored till one do not feel like doing anything, indirectly feeding one's boredom?..ah-hah..i know this answer..YES!!..u can be soooo bored till u dun feel like doing anything!!..u juz feel like sitting ard doing nothing but complaining..hmmm..seems like wat im doing now..

i tink i need to get a life..get a job?..maybe..hmm..or is god trying to tell mi sumthing more?..wat is it?..i guess i'll haf to go pray bout it later..

since we r toking bout questions..i haf a few more to ask..y do ppl buy clothes when they know tt they can nvr wear it to church?..y do they buy mini-skirts or skimpy clothes or clothes with all-the-farni wordings..knowing fully well they cannot wear it to church?..is church different from the other communities?..isnt church supposed to be like ur home?..y r u different when u r in church and when u r not?..is this called having 2 personalities?..or is it juz our own carnial nature to wear such clothes..y do we wear these clothes anyway?..obviously its to attract attention..i read somewhere tt some clothes gurls wear can stimulate things in guys..so ppl dun wear them to church..cos its deemed inappropraite..but wats the difference when u wear it outside?..so u can stimulate guys outside church w/o being rebuked?..same thing..y do we act differently in church and out?..y do we curse and swear outside chuch but become an angel when we r in church?..wat r ppl trying to show?..y do we do things outside church tt we know r wrong/inappropraite?..human beings r wierd creatures dun u tink?..do u honestly tink tt if u haf a bf/gf outside church no one ll know?..or tt if u sin outside church no one ll know?..is god only in church but not out of church?..where does god live?..in church?..or in ur heart?..hmmm..

*did u tink of mi today?*

I got up early one morning
and rushed right into the day.
I had so much to accomplish
that I didn't have time to pray.
Problems just tumbled about me,and heavier came each task;
"Why doesn't God help me?" I wondered.
He answered, "You didn't ask,"

I wanted to see joy and beauty,
but the day toiled on gray and bleak;
I wondered why God didn't show me.
He said, "But you didn't seek."

I tried to come into God's presence;
I used all my keys at the lock.
God gently and lovingly chided,
"My child, you didn't knock."

I woke up early this morning and
paused before entering the new day;
I had so much to accomplish that
I had to take time to pray.
-Author Unknown

its my bro's bday today..

i have been robbed of my room!!..bec today is my brother's bday..my parents decided to get him an xbox and now.. he and his fren is playing his stupid xbox in my room!!..so crappy man!!..i juz knew tt the xbox was so not a good idea bec:
1) i ll be robbed of my room,
2) he ll constantly play his xbox and he wun study at all(no matter how much he tries to say tt this wun happen) and
3) it'll cause a lot of trouble for the whole family!!
y dun i get a present for my bday and he does?..

trying to be a nice sister..i got him a present..2 bags of potato chips..hey..its the only practical gift for a guy!!..u see..tks to the brothers in church..i finally realised tt nothing is more impt to a guy den food..so y not get them food?..they'll juz like it rite..i dunno!!..

*cant get u off my mind..do u or do u not?*

i shall wait for my patrick..

xmas is over already..on xmas eve..we went to kemmy's house to haf a slumber party..at first i couldnt go cos i had been going out everyday till late le..but my mom finally relented and let mi go..it was really fun man!!..and best was tt when i called my father..he allowed me to stay over at her house!!..i was so so so happy la!!..

kemmy's house is awesome man!!..i wana stay there forever lah!!..and terrer was sooooo cute too..hahaha..i wan a dog!!..anyways..i finally fell asleep in kemmy's gorgeous bedroom at 6..

woke up at 8 and rushed home..cos i had this family xmas party at my ah ma house..turned out to be a real sucky event..i wasnt in my best mood already cos i was darn tired..and my relatives decided to piss mi off even more..u see..tks to my mom..my whole family now knows tt im a christian..and so..they decided to come all at once to attack mi and mock mi for converting..they keep harping tt since i still had a grandmother who's a buddhist..i shldnt convert..huh?!..wat is the bloody relavance?..accepting god is my own choice wat..so if my grandmother decides to be a christian only den i can be one too?..wat stupid logic is tt?..den if my grandmother decides to worship an egg i muz follow too?..wat is this?..i juz dun understand!!..ahhhh!!..i cant wait for the day when god finally touch their hearts and they too convert..wah tt day i shall laugh and suan them man..but before tt..i ll juz smile and nod at everything..crap!!..

makes mi feel like y am i so persistant in god..y am i giving up on my family's love for this god of mine?..sumtimes i tink of giving up..juz go back to my old ways of being a complete messed up..life is so short anyway..so y am i giving my all for a god whom i cant even see anyway?..sumtimes i tink to myself wat if i was wrong..wat if i had believed in the wrong god..wat if sum other god is real instead?..den how?..den i'll get real scared too..den i'll tink..there r still doubts within mi..how can i go lead others?..how can i help them?..how can i be a shepherd?..a CL?..funny joke huh..budden i c the faces of the ppl in church..so many faces..and i tink back to the times i feel in church..and i tink of my frens in church..my leaders..the pastors..i hear the testimonies..and i tink back to the miracles tt had happened in my life..i see how serene my bros and sis are..the pure joy i feel when im with them..the laughter, the hardships and the pain..and im reminded y im giving my all for Him..i sing songs of worship to Him..and i feel Him..and when i tok to Him..i hear His reply..and when im down..He sent ppl to cheer mi up..how can He be a fake?..no way..and im convicted once more..

yesterday i had my ex-class gathering..commonwealth one..guess where?..at marina for steamboat again!!..where else?..hahah..the ppl there haven changed yet..hmmm maybe more lame than ever..budden it was good to c them..i had to leave at 920 cos of my stupid curfew la!!..everybody was so enjoying themselves..and i heard they went to kbox till like 3?..and poor mi haf to go home..oh well..i shall be a nice gurl..hahahha..

was msging dewen the other day in my ah ma place..hahah..he said tt i was a demure and shy lady man!!..first time!!..hey ppl..actually this is very true lor..im actually a very demure person!!...hahahha..yeah man!!..im glad tt someone in this whole universe finally realised this!!..oh yeah..i still need a job!!

*still thinking of you..wat r u doing now?*

xmas is tml...

im tuitioning my brother now..in his maths..so while he's doing his sums..i decided not to waste my time and blog instead..

tml haf to arrive at nexus at 8 again for image..and i juz toked to germ in msn..she says tt tml morn..there ll be nobody there except for mi and her!!..jaron's in thailand..giselle ll be late..alicia got school till like 7..and lishan can only come at 10am..and we gotta make-up for ppl in drama, dance, the hosts, singers and prob the ushers also..how how!?..we r gonna be totally crazy tml man..and germ wana 'test' mi..she say she muz train mi before she die of exhaustion..so scared lor..im supposed to decide wat make-up to put for them tml..i very scared to make this type of decision one..oh well..muz haf a spirit of exellence!!...hahah..

oh yeah!!..gotta update u guys bout yesterday!!..was super fun man..and super tiring also..well we were supposed to meet at 1230 at harbourfront to take bus to sentosa..budden as usual..ppl r late!!..so we ended up in sentosa at ard 2pm..and den..we were split up into teams..my team got mi,ruisi,eunice,nicole,jane,guan and sylvia..our game was sumthing like monopoly one..supposed to go ard sentosa looking for the games master..

our first game was eugene's station..at fort siloso..dunno who came up wid tt game lah!!..we had to mix up some puke-smelling water and den stand in a row..throw the water and try to catch it from the first to the last person..den the last person had to collect the water..but..the wind was so strong tt we couldnt catch any water at all lor!!..and it stinked!!!..so at last..we juz poured the water..yucks..

den we went to victor's station..at lost civilisation..i tink we walked for like half an hour la!!..cos got no straight bus..was sooo happy when we finally reached!!..we had a scavenger hunt..was so glad tt i brought my lipstick!!..cos tt was one of the bonus items..hahah..quite easy..

third was xinyi's station..very hard to explain this game in words..juz wana say tt..jane!!..u r super lousy lah!!..cant even rmb even aft we told u!!..we maxed out all our tries and xinyi decided to give us money(fake money) bec of entertainment value..

den it was joanna's station..at the merlion..where we had to rmb the black/white sequence of 12 squares..we were the only team to got the 1st sequence right the first time!!..i tink we rawked man...hahah..

last was kemmy's station at tanjong beach..had to find ping pong balls hidden in the sand..ahahha..aft tt..we ran all the way to the sea and jumped in la!!..so bloody hot and everything..the water was perfect!!..hahah..had a fun time throwing ppl into the sea and everything..swam till like 7/8 sumthing before going off..wat a great day!!..hahah..

18th dec 2004

woke up at 6 am to prepare to go to nexus..cos i had image..was supposed to meet jaron at 7 to go together..well..knowing tt he would be late..i decided to be late too and reached there at like 710..guess wat?..tt guy was even later!!..how can a guy be permanantly late for every occasion one ah?..so i waited, waited..and waited somemore and finally at 717..he sent mi a msg to ask mi whether i had reached and he was walking there now..wow!!..he is really very li hai leh..was so glad to c him lor..cos the mrt was really really hot..even tho i was wearing a t-shirt!!..so fo course..we were late for image..again..

anyway..image today was one of the busiest days i ever saw..so many ppl were coming in and out of the room and we had no time for a break!!..hahah..and i got scolded by germ today..cos she said i put the blusher for everybody till like wang faye like tt..oh well..gotta clean it off and re-do again..haha..but it was super fun!!..and there was a new gurl joining image today..her name was alicia..had a great time toking to her..looking forward to nxt thurs!!..

we had no visitors today!!..so we had to sit in africa room!!..so sad lor..couldnt really enjoy the atmosphere!!..there were so many ppl today!!..den those unfortunate ppl like albert even had to sit in the reception..which was definately worse den us la..nxt wk gotta haf visitors!!..how can juz waste christmas like tt?..so not fun lor..

well aft tt..we had dinner den we went to istana park to practise our caroling actions and songs..mi and xiang planned the actions before tt budden the grp decided not to use them..well..a bit sad bout it..but still..caroling was fun!!..hahha..at like 720 my dad sent mi a msg telling mi to go home for dinner..den janey prayed for mi(first time leh!!) and when i called my father again..he said tt i muz be home by 1030 latest..praise god man!!..another blessing..when we set off for caroling..the first few houses tt we went to we got rejected..so we decided to pray and ta-da!!..we succeded in caroling for the nxt house tt we went to!!..amazing man!!..god is amazing!!..hahhah..

at 940 i had to leave for home..cos we were at 6th ave den take about 40 to 45 mins to reach home..so i waited at the bus stop..waited, waited, and waited for 970 but it didnt come till 1003!!..i was so pissed yet relieved when it finally came!!..was praying to god profusely..another miracle..i had to take 970 to kap to change to 170..usually this takes a long time..but i reached my stop at 1030!!..cant believe it man!!..to save time..i ran all da way home and reached at 1035..hahah..not too bad!!..did pretty well today..considering its the first time tt i finally told my parents tt im going church!!..god is so totally amazing!!

geral came today..haven seen u for such a long time gurl!!..cos u were bz working!!..so hows our shepherding day huh?..so glad to c u!!..and tks for ya gift!!

we wish you a merry christmas and a happy new year!!

christmas is juz ard the corner!!..so fast!!..oh my gosh!!..so so so excited..hahah..

announcement ppl..18th dec(which is tml) there is a xmas service part one..23rd dec(thurs) there is a xmas service part 2..21st dec(thu) we having a party at sentosa..anybody wana come pls msg mi k..hahah..u r welcomed to every event!!..

tonight im gonna meet up wid mi sec sch frens for dinner..at jp..haha..haven seen them for a long time..cant wait man..

i really tink tt tml is gonna be a damn fun day..firstly..i got image!!...yeah!..and its NOT to see someone ok..i miss image a lot..den theres service..which promises to be cool and fun..and den we r going caroling..hahha..i juz saw a preview of the caroling actions from xiang..hehhe..i tink its gonna be hilarious man..and i guess the brothers wun wana do it lor..hahah..

i need a job soon!!..no..i need it now!..any lobang ppl?..

*i dunno y im thinking bout you but i am..*

welcome house

im finally back at my house..and to my bed..and my toilet..and my tv..ahhh!!..i haven been homw since last sat!!..ok..this was my schedule..sat to mon i went to KL..tues i had prom..wed to thurs i had chuch camp..thurs to sun i had family chalet!!..this is hell man..hahha..i haf sooo many things to update u guys about..

but first..wana say sorry tt i haven added in my tagboard..hahah..was too busy ppl!!..im a busy ladiee..heheh

i nearly died in KL..really!!..its was so rush lor..sat night at 10 we sat the bus there..reached at 400 in the morning den stayed up playing cards at the hotel lobby till 8..den went shopping till like 330 before checking in at the hotel again..during this period of time..i almost died lor..i didnt haf enuf sleep and i didnt eat at all..not a good combination ppl..my whole body was in pain and my legs felt weak..im fact my whole body was suan lor..only aft i ate sumthing den i got better..and btw..interesting news..my hotel room was haunted!!..yeah!!..guess wats my roon no.?..1313 on the 13th floor..a sure hit for disaster..hahah..so many farni things happen lor..eerie man..luckily i was there for only 1 day..too many things to blog..quite lazy..juz ask mi when u c mi k..

prom was ok..better than i expected..well..maybe cos i expected it to really sucks..the guys were more suai there..ahah..nothing really happened tt made me remember it..so u can c how erm..boring?..it was..den went back to meisa's house and spent the night there..

at 7 the nxt morn..took train to church camp..at changi..it was fun!!..hahah..juz tt i got quite pissed during the games..was really cool ya noe..when we had praise and worship..they carried out the drums guitar out to the open ground and we had praise and worship right there..like having a rock concert like tt..hahha..got closer to all the ppl during camp too..i tink tt it was terrific..muz be bec we had such a great time fellowshipping and all tt..

ok i shall continue another day..cos im suddenly tired of typing..hahaha..stay tuned..