boring

like how boring was today?..maybe theres something wrong with mi..it was juz a sense of, hmmm dread?..im not too sure also la..the day started out ok..woke up early to go study session at 12 but no one was there yet..and i didnt know y i had to wake up so early to go to somewhere where ppl said they wanted to go but turned up late..did work with daniel's laptop and thanks daniel!..joel and yk came at like 1245 and didnt do much work before we went to eat lunch..prayer meeting started at 130 and it didnt helped that i was attitude-ed..

got damn sian and juz wanted to stone..was tinking y in the world do i haf to go thru so much stuff for ppl when they obviously dun care..or maybe it's juz mi..was THROUGHLY burdened during prayer meet and i juz wanted to cry..den the song came, and there was this line..lord, we trust in your unfailing love..it was den, that suddenly, i felt the tears appeared and flowed..i haven cried in service for a long time..haven cried while singing a song for a long time..i didnt haf any feelings but the tears juz came..i was so embarrassed lol..

lord, wat can i do but to trust in you? that wat is happening now is for the better? den u are doing ur work and ppl can feel u coming in to change their lives and they are restricting u? and they restrict mi as well and it sucks!..y do i haf to slog for ppl who dun care..but god, ive been there..ive been where i restricted you cos u were trying to change mi..i protested and im sure i disappointed my leaders quite a lot..always believed in this phrase - what goes around comes aroud - now ive felt wat my leaders felt while taking care of mi..and if they didnt perseverd, i wouldnt be in this position to persevere and lead others to be wat u intended for them to be..and i rmb i did tell u that i wanted to play a part in the moulding of youths..but i didnt realise, that its so hard..

maybe cos im a rather emotional person..and i hurt easily ba..

service time got better..praise and worship rocked and i was standing beside gideon!..haha..dinner was lethargic..had meeting and was quite inspired by dan's words..however, i felt that i made a mistake while toking to my grp and i felt horrible after that..it seems as tho im making so many mistakes now?..i guess i really gotta learn to take control as well as tinking thru wat i want to say real carefully and pick my choice of words carefully..had nothing to do so went to dota after that..didnt felt like playing anymore after one game and i caused everyone to end..sorry guys..

went for dinner before slacking outside xbox..didnt feel like staying so i went home with hannah..laughed with her and the west guys on the journey back home which took my mind off things..went back home, sat down in front of my com..and all i felt was..blank..which is weird..ubber weirdness..

i tink i shld go choose worship songs..i wonder wats wrong with mi..