my rights
there are many christians in the world who sincerely wans to serve god to their fullest..but somehow, no matter how much they try, they dun seem to be able to go forward in watever spiritual stage that they are in..and they feel frustrated, somehow bewildered as tho why they dun seem to be moving forward in their spiritual lives..they earnestly try watever they know to seek god, to hear from his voice..they pray, fast, read and do all sorts of things that they know..yet they still seem..stuck..
and they get discouraged..somehow disappointed..and they keep asking why god why? i wan to come nearer to you..i sincerely really want to..im doing all the best that i know how..but why do i still feel as tho im still so far?..maybe they start to tink am i doing something wrong? is god purposely letting mi feel so away from him? wat else can i do? wat else?
sometimes i feel like that too..and i realized wat was my problem..
i wasnt dying to my rights.
God revealed somethings to me today..he said that u dun haf to depend on watever u know to draw near to me..u can never take any human step in coming to know me better..because watever u do know of me, has been chosen by me to be revealed to you in the first place..and in my hands lay the power to reveal more of myself to you, not you having the power to do things to come to know me..and i ll tell u a little secret, i will reveal myself to you..these are my terms..
Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."
Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."
Another disciple said to him, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father."
But Jesus told him, " Follow me, and let the dead bury thier own dead."
oh lord, how it is so true that im not dying to my rights..how can i wan to follow you, but still negotiate to you on my own terms? when u desperately need something, u will do anything to attain it, you wouldnt haf time to negotiate on terms..so how can we, still try to bargain with god?
and they get discouraged..somehow disappointed..and they keep asking why god why? i wan to come nearer to you..i sincerely really want to..im doing all the best that i know how..but why do i still feel as tho im still so far?..maybe they start to tink am i doing something wrong? is god purposely letting mi feel so away from him? wat else can i do? wat else?
sometimes i feel like that too..and i realized wat was my problem..
i wasnt dying to my rights.
God revealed somethings to me today..he said that u dun haf to depend on watever u know to draw near to me..u can never take any human step in coming to know me better..because watever u do know of me, has been chosen by me to be revealed to you in the first place..and in my hands lay the power to reveal more of myself to you, not you having the power to do things to come to know me..and i ll tell u a little secret, i will reveal myself to you..these are my terms..
Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."
- Matthew 16:24
Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go."
Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."
Another disciple said to him, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father."
But Jesus told him, " Follow me, and let the dead bury thier own dead."
- Matthew 8:18-22
oh lord, how it is so true that im not dying to my rights..how can i wan to follow you, but still negotiate to you on my own terms? when u desperately need something, u will do anything to attain it, you wouldnt haf time to negotiate on terms..so how can we, still try to bargain with god?
my rights arent always wrong..i haf a right to be comfortable, i haf a right to do wat i wan with my own time..but those are my rights! those arent god's terms..and if i hang onto my rights, den god cannot use me to do his work..wat if he wanted mi to go to some rural parts of asia to reach out to people who haf never heard of his first coming, and i harp on my right not to go cos well, maybe cos those places do not have air conditioning? it is my right! i dun wan to go is my right..den the opportunity cost of it, is i lose out on god's big picture..and the funniest thing is..at the end of the day, people still go back to god and ask why am i not drawing closer to you?
it is my right to have a boyfriend..it is my right to be in a relationship..relationships arent bad, in fact god created them! it is my right, and your right, to be in a relationship any point of time in your life..but wat if god wanted to use the time when u are single, to develop all that love in ur heart for something greater in future? wat if god wanted to teach you be so single-minded on his work so that you might be a testimony that would draw others seeking for love to Him? but how can he..when ur heart is divided between him and ur perceived other significant self? if u harp on your right to be in a relationship at the wrong time, den u lose out..its simple, isnt it?
it is my right to stay at home and be a good member of the family..after all, obeying ur parents at all costs is wat god asked of mi rite? so it is my right to stay home and not venture out or commit too much to the church..so no matter how much ur shepherds or leaders urge you, persuade and reason with you..u harp on ur right not to commit..yup, it is ur right alright..den i hope u remain happy at the spiritual stage that you are in, and dun blame god or anyone if somehow, u dun feel as close to god as you hoped..or look ard and see others whom god seemed to be blessing in so many areas of ur life and ask why isnt god blessing you?
you cant have the best of both worlds if you insist on your rights. the only way to have the best of both worlds, is to accept god's terms.
that is juz the first step - to deny your rights.
for me, it is a struggle to deny my rights of logging onto youtube and watching all those nice taiwan shows that i absolutely love..i still fail..miserably at times..but NO!..i wan to deny my rights! lord..use my singlehood, my abundance of free time, my resources, my relationships all for your work..help me to deny my rights more..the reason why i can run endlessly, tho sometimes feeling horribly tired, in this spiritual race..is cause i know the end that is in store for me..
"Well done, my good and faithful servant. Welcome home"
for those few words, i will give you my life..
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