Why?

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Psalm 139:14

Dear God,

How am I fearfully and wonderfully made?
Before I was conceived, why did u decide to create me as me?
Why am I so insecure, that I wonder whether I am good enough to retain my friends?
Why am I so competitive, tinking that if I dun achieve that standard, I have failed?
Why am I such a perfectionist, that I am always just behind that line of feeling contented?
Why am I surronded with good friends who really want to help me, yet feel that I should not burden them with my burdens?
Why do I know that I have strengths, yet unable to pinpoint exactly what strengths I have?
Why do I feel that I have a ton of weaknesses, and simply cannot do anything right?
Why is it that I know that I have you, but feel like I must work harder to get to know you even better?
Why is it that I know that I am victorious in you, but feel like I have failed miserably?

Dear Lord, why oh why?

O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. Although it all seems dark and murky now, I want to trust you. I wana trust that you love me precisely because I am me.