where things arent wat they seem

its only in the nights where everyone's in their own dreamworld and where im still awake, that i realise how silent and terribly alone i am..that even tho im engulfed with so much emotions that im heavily burdened, but yet at the same time, i cant get it all out..dunno wat it is, dunno how it is..dunno y its there..

human beings haf an inborn-tendency to hide..things that make us seem vulnerable, things that we are scared of, things that we know are wrong, things that make us seem different..we dun even know why we are hiding it for..we juz know that if other ppl finds out that means we are in deep shit..wat does deep shit mean anyway in a world that has proven that its final destination is destruction?..the facade of the world taught human beings how to put on a facade of themselves..there was this conversation tt i recently had with a fren tt goes like this..

fren: see, i knew u would be alright.
mi: how do u know?
fren: duh, since when is jinqi not alright?
mi: haha, yeah i guess so.

i asked jiemin one day, that wat is the one area in her life that she finds it the most diff to trust completely in god..i got my own answer..i find it hard to trust god in things that i know im good at and am given ample time to plan for..

its 425am and i haf school tml..how would i ever wake up?..do u know wats the worst mistake anyone can ever commit?..in my opinion, that would be to presume that one's life ends when one dies here on earth..and for that mistake, u can never make up for it..

keep it up gurl..u are faring well in this world..